tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25538680502545825562024-03-12T21:37:27.438-07:00Cerita lawak....Ketawa-ketawa gak...
Solat jangan lupa...aziznasirhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05443359000828012985noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2553868050254582556.post-47676055136554187632009-09-10T23:18:00.000-07:002009-09-10T23:20:18.540-07:00Kene dah....Sekumpulan lelaki berada di bilik persalinan<br />di<br />salah sebuah kelab<br />eklusive lagi mewah di pusat bandar, setelah<br />keluar dari gym...<br /><br />Tiba-tiba kedengaran deringan Handphone di<br />penjuru bilik tersebut.<br />Seorang lelaki menjawap panggilan itu dan<br />terjadilah perbualan seperti<br />berikut...<br /><br />"Hello?"<br />"Abang, nie sayang nie,"<br />"emmm..."<br /><br />"Abang masih ada di kelab lagi ke?"<br />"iya."<br />"sayang sekarang nie berada di shopping<br />complex<br />dua block dari kelab<br />abang tu... Sayang ada nampak kain sutera<br />terbaru . . cantik bang,<br />Boleh ke sayang beli?"<br /><br />"Berapa harga nya?"<br />"Cuma $1500.00 aje"<br />"O.K, belilah kalau memang awak dah suka<br />sangat"<br /><br />"Ahhh thanks bang dan tadi sebelum datang<br />sini<br />sayang ada singgah di<br />Cycle & Carriage dan tengok Mercedes model<br />terbaru 2001. Sayang suka<br />kat<br />satu model tu. Dan sayang dah bincang<br />dengan<br />jurujualnya dan dia<br />setuju<br />nak bagi good price... lagipun elok juga kita<br />tukarkan dengan BMW yang<br />kita beli tahun lepas tu.. ."<br /><br />"Berapa harga yang dia bagi?"<br />"Cuma $280,000..."<br />"O.k tapi pastikan harga tu dah on the road."<br /><br />"Great!, before we hang up, ada satu perkara<br />lagi..."<br />"Apa?"<br />"Abang jangan terkejut pulak, sayang dah<br />semak<br />akaun bank abang<br />dan... pagi tadi sayang singgah dipejabat<br />ejen<br />hartanah dan sayang<br />dapat tau rumah yang kita tengok tahun lepas<br />tu...<br />sekarang nie untuk<br />dijual!! Abang ingat tak? Rumah yang ada<br />swimming pool bentuk love<br />tu,<br />ada taman orkid kat belakang, berhadapan<br />dengan<br />pantai tu... cantik<br />kan<br />bang..."<br />"Berapa harga yang mereka minta?"<br />"Cuma $740,000... o.k kan bang, dan sayang<br />tengok dalam akaun kita<br />boleh cover harga tu..."<br />"Eloklah kalau macam tu, confirm cepat<br />sebelum<br />orang lain beli, tapi<br />cuba dapatkan harga $700,000. OK?"<br /><br />"OK, abang sayang, terima kasih bang, kita<br />jumpa<br />malam nanti ye!!<br />I Love You!!!"<br />"Bye... I Love you too..."<br /><br />Lelaki itu berhenti bercakap, menutup flap<br />handphone... sambil<br />mengangkat tangan yang memegang<br />handphone tu<br />dan bertanya pada yang<br />ada dalam bilik tersebut :<br /><br />"""ADA SESIAPA TAHU... HANDPHONE NIE<br />SIAPA PUNYA?""" <br /><br />*sumber : sebiru langit<br />I love Islam.comaziznasirhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05443359000828012985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2553868050254582556.post-14659181234562886812009-09-10T23:08:00.001-07:002009-09-10T23:12:30.996-07:00Gambar menarik...<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_yFxHxUFUZUSFF3DYjq8AiPt94FH7Z8EVOYTHdFM0U8BkEZTd-CX_QPXt2dKzP9oXlGC6HX04cHNxpNHpZTzBMRa3g0zcJIW24DOem3BKq3d-Qu_WDIRGAI8OM_4fyO63_vnrMvhL-XXu/s1600-h/laughk.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 247px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_yFxHxUFUZUSFF3DYjq8AiPt94FH7Z8EVOYTHdFM0U8BkEZTd-CX_QPXt2dKzP9oXlGC6HX04cHNxpNHpZTzBMRa3g0zcJIW24DOem3BKq3d-Qu_WDIRGAI8OM_4fyO63_vnrMvhL-XXu/s320/laughk.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088740627456818" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL01cy8ZYWmLakFhRvTP2o9n0h26SwiItziAWB0d68epxrwVgadibvsfGtGqALk3_lhYC0aPzE8Mx7U6yzb6kGkCTdfHBtwZnswFh0dwtmqJQvy9lDi1wb_Ysl2tLepZ1aBFd6XjDP3AjC/s1600-h/image016.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 241px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL01cy8ZYWmLakFhRvTP2o9n0h26SwiItziAWB0d68epxrwVgadibvsfGtGqALk3_lhYC0aPzE8Mx7U6yzb6kGkCTdfHBtwZnswFh0dwtmqJQvy9lDi1wb_Ysl2tLepZ1aBFd6XjDP3AjC/s320/image016.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088626223648194" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitIHe-g76E2A3vxRaJyF_rliy6a9VLT-Rn3p8gXCU8vbsfLo_hCng96NLAYzh8Q-fXUkpzZChyphenhyphenzQ32hDzaV_-9wYB6wfe-PhzRK-SjfkOFzu8TiVp79F42IBqf8omeQZi6sbAilHDafSul/s1600-h/image012.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 254px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitIHe-g76E2A3vxRaJyF_rliy6a9VLT-Rn3p8gXCU8vbsfLo_hCng96NLAYzh8Q-fXUkpzZChyphenhyphenzQ32hDzaV_-9wYB6wfe-PhzRK-SjfkOFzu8TiVp79F42IBqf8omeQZi6sbAilHDafSul/s320/image012.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088532153199810" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8dLGx2MpyhcpYZtzXTMF5QE5Ubo2NNTz1jRQ7zDZV42DBNtyDIWrpWW4iugCICq4cnHMeNCofMw7AQg3mqZdcQhhOlznZa81ZAwxxsobQgMiQ9ceIjEuW597evdznQj6genVPNxq4AtiN/s1600-h/image009.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 178px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8dLGx2MpyhcpYZtzXTMF5QE5Ubo2NNTz1jRQ7zDZV42DBNtyDIWrpWW4iugCICq4cnHMeNCofMw7AQg3mqZdcQhhOlznZa81ZAwxxsobQgMiQ9ceIjEuW597evdznQj6genVPNxq4AtiN/s320/image009.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088450975986962" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgEFgU8NlrOGgM7AWd9HJ2rTq0Xv_BDP7mdFiM72lST-aKvRmNg5LgChkMhrHy99CieGE4dqDAhLs0gtt7MStpPjXoGrYOfRlAT-URuKcdTV-xY5WouMPpMAKtbjtQU8wGoqkV8N434XCn/s1600-h/image007.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 182px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgEFgU8NlrOGgM7AWd9HJ2rTq0Xv_BDP7mdFiM72lST-aKvRmNg5LgChkMhrHy99CieGE4dqDAhLs0gtt7MStpPjXoGrYOfRlAT-URuKcdTV-xY5WouMPpMAKtbjtQU8wGoqkV8N434XCn/s320/image007.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088293421393458" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvjubFPsmwxnD6DUZWecJNiOLkRavqASm-GL5ZM05TIdCbuoyS3fjRQjeC7T02hHTXyOYoZeZheyTZWe-baZBgDplyOk6LQc8EkZB6D3N2iq_0GizKo4ticqMbazrkfi9K8VJHl6XgtzKf/s1600-h/image003.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 297px; height: 246px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvjubFPsmwxnD6DUZWecJNiOLkRavqASm-GL5ZM05TIdCbuoyS3fjRQjeC7T02hHTXyOYoZeZheyTZWe-baZBgDplyOk6LQc8EkZB6D3N2iq_0GizKo4ticqMbazrkfi9K8VJHl6XgtzKf/s320/image003.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088156008313778" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiivTC3-Z9jnIytldBleMTTqzY1SE7zplPsB-eQxsLo3LSHgndbPfyQl9kap8j2qWHnanPRFzN61fptVi7n5h36oW8fDLKznDGSvhCo_SjE2pKH2ELlQQ_IkX-L7gq8kJsnJvLV4CTNCvQf/s1600-h/image002.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 257px; height: 235px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiivTC3-Z9jnIytldBleMTTqzY1SE7zplPsB-eQxsLo3LSHgndbPfyQl9kap8j2qWHnanPRFzN61fptVi7n5h36oW8fDLKznDGSvhCo_SjE2pKH2ELlQQ_IkX-L7gq8kJsnJvLV4CTNCvQf/s320/image002.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380088045769747362" /></a><br /><br />*sumber : jiwang.orgaziznasirhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05443359000828012985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2553868050254582556.post-54375822595311180042009-09-10T21:33:00.000-07:002009-09-10T21:35:12.766-07:00Koleksi lawak pendek....Cerita 1<br /><br />Asari melihat rakannya, Ajoi.. sedang membuat kopi...kemudian<br />memasukkan sebutir ubat panadol ke dalamnya. Dengan kehairanan Asari<br />bertanya kepada Ajoi...<br />Asari: "Kenapa kau masukkan panadol dalam kopi tu?"<br />Ajoi: "Kopi ni panas.. bagi panadol.. kurang sikit panas dia.."<br /><br />Cerita 2<br /><br />Seorang pemburu bertembung dengan seekor singa. Terrperanjat, dia<br />tak sempat mengangkat senapangnya.Tiada pilihan, pemburu itu<br />bertadah tangan dan berdoa.Ketika pemburu itu menjeling ke arah<br />singa, dia ternampak bahawa singa itu juga sedang berdoa.<br />Pemburu: "Ah leganya........singa baik rupanya. Selamatlah aku.."<br />Singa: "Ya.......singa yang baik selalu baca doa sebelum makan."<br /><br />Cerita 3<br /><br />Seorang pegawai polis masuk ke bilik mayat sebuah hospital untuk menyiasat<br />punca kematian tiga lelaki sekaligus. Selepas memeriksa mayat-mayat itu,<br />dia bertanya kepada penjaga bilik berkenaan.<br /><br />Polis : Mengapa ketiga-tiga mayat tersenyum?<br />Penjaga : Lelaki pertama sedang bersanding, apabila tiba2 diserang strok.<br />Lelaki kedua pula khabarnya menang loteri dan mati serangan sakit jantung<br />manakala yg ketiga disambar petir.<br />Polis : Hah! Kenapa disambar petir pun tersenyum?<br />Penjaga : Masa tu dia ingat orang sedang ambil gambarnya...<br /><br />Cerita 4<br /><br />Sebaik sahaja mengambil tempat duduk di ruang menunggu sebuah klinik,<br />Lias terpandang Amin sedang menangis teresak-esak. Dia segera mendekati Amin.<br /><br />Lias : Kenapa menangis?<br />Amin : Saya datang untuk ujian darah.<br />Lias : Awak takut ke?<br />Amin : Bukan itu sebabnya. Semasa ujian darah dijalankan, mereka telah<br />terpotong jari saya.<br />(Mendengarkan penjelasan Amin, Shan menangis.)<br />Amin : Eh, kenapa pula awak menangis?<br />Lias : Saya datang untuk ujian air kencing...<br /><br />Cerita 5<br /><br />Seorang lelaki pergi ke klinik mata. Setelah matanya diperiksa, dia bertanya: " Doktor, lepas pakai cermin mata nanti, boleh ke saya membaca macam orang lain?"<br />"Dah tentu, " jawab doktor. "Oh, gembiranya. Dah lama saya buta huruf, akhirnya boleh juga saya membaca," kata lelaki itu dengan riang.<br /><br />Cerita 6<br /><br />Seorang posmen yang datang menghantar surat .<br />" Assalamualaikum "<br />" Walaikumsalam "<br />" Ni rumah encik Sameon ye?<br />" Ya saya"<br />" Poning kepala saya mencari alamat rumah encik ni "<br />" Buat susah aje encik nie! Apsal tak pos aje?"<br /><br />Cerita 7<br /><br />3 org Asli menaiki motor dan ditahan polis trafik. Namun pemandu motor tersebut<br />tidak berhenti. Katanya, 'Tak Muat Dah Tok, Kami dah bertiga!!!aziznasirhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05443359000828012985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2553868050254582556.post-65934653323137196692008-08-30T09:21:00.000-07:002009-03-20T10:00:52.792-07:00How to make moneyBASIC FOREX<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw79FozxgMYvYBr79QBwOHk4ehgdS7sxDQAYAsuh2gIM_F8qIgI1fdI2pzXcG0hWgkszKW60jVBaEIafRhPR2g5SJJbjstxNRECKmC1Zx6CEO2uEdpphw9P4Y3-mDcY-LHi-RW374_VTzw/s1600-h/ca9af8b2d5f9a798.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 130px; height: 84px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw79FozxgMYvYBr79QBwOHk4ehgdS7sxDQAYAsuh2gIM_F8qIgI1fdI2pzXcG0hWgkszKW60jVBaEIafRhPR2g5SJJbjstxNRECKmC1Zx6CEO2uEdpphw9P4Y3-mDcY-LHi-RW374_VTzw/s320/ca9af8b2d5f9a798.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5315313357244223314" /></a><br />Here are the TOP SECRET ingredients needed to create the ultimate business:<br /><br />1. You <br />2. Computer <br />3. Internet connection <br />4. Desk (or sofa) <br /><br />That’s it! No employees. No advertising. No cold calling. No inventory. <br />Imagine a business with just you, your computer, and a high-speed Internet connection?! That’s all you need trade in the foreign exchange market!! In other words... <br /><br />A properly trained Forex trader can potentially earn BIG PROFITS in every single month, week, or day! (Of course a poorly trained Forex trader can suffer big losses as well.)<br />Let’s continue on the with the TOP SECRET directions for creating the ultimate business:<br /><br />1. Walk ten steps and <br />2. Sit in front of your computer (or sit on your sofa and place laptop on your lap) <br />3. Turn on computer and make sure Internet connection is working <br />4. Open charts and trading platform <br />5. Trade currencies <br />6. Make money! <br /><br />Presto! You’ve just learned how to create the ultimate business. Okay it's not thaaaat easy but you get the picture. <br />Consider the Following and Judge for Yourself<br /><br />• YOU ARE YOUR BOSS! <br />• You don’t need any customers! <br />• You don’t need employees! <br />• You can operate from home, work, vacation or anywhere else in the world as long as you have an Internet connection. <br />• You never have to worry about job security, harassment or any other employment-related anxiety. <br /><br />• YOU ARE YOUR OWN BOSS! <br />• You never need to worry about employer payroll, strikes, theft, rent increases, health inspectors, lease problems, being sued, etc… <br />• You don't need to do any cold calling. <br />• You decide which days you wish to work - You make the decision to take a vacation at a moment's notice. <br /><br />• YOU ARE YOUR OWN BOSS!aziznasirhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05443359000828012985noreply@blogger.com0